Just Another Cold Dark and Rainy Day
by cg2006
Summary: It's yet another cold dark and rainy day for Sasuke and Naruto. Naruto invited Sasuke in to try a new ramen flavor, but of course the Uchiha is reluctant to try it. So Naruto sits on him, meanwhile looking up SasuNaruSasu fanfiction on a laptop. Two shot.
1. Chapter 1

Hm, it's been a while since I've done anything on fanfiction. net. my apologies!! Um, but here's a little two shot I wrote. It gets kind of boring here in Taiwan now (i'm visiting) because I stay inside my grandma's house most of the time, and I have a laptop, but there's not even solitaire or anything on it, and I don't feel like drawing, and I brought my NDS but I've been beating up so many people on Bleach: Blade of Fate it's getting kind of boring now because I just fight for money now so I can buy everything from the Urahara shop...It seems so wrong to be fighting for money, but really that's all I have left to do, pretty much. I mean, I beat story mode in like three days, playing a few hours each time. T.T Yeah...you readers dont need to know that anyway.. onward with the story! that was a random thought I had in my mind. enjoy!

**It was a cold, dark, and rainy day. **

"Ne, Sasuke?" said Naruto without looking up. "Why are there a lot of cold, dark, and rainy day stories about us? I mean, I don't get it..."

The other boy shrugged. "How the hell would I know."

"I really don't get what goes on inside fangirls' minds."

"Nobody wants to."

Naruto nodded in agreement, his eyes still glued to the laptop screen. He sat on the couch, leaning against the arm rest with his legs draped over Sasuke's lap. Sasuke stared at the ceiling that omitted light tapping noises from the raindrops pounding on the roof.

"How do they even come up with this stuff?"

"Again, nobody wants to know..."

The blond stroked (Sasuke er I MEAN--:D) the touchpad. "And they pretty much all turn out the same. We end up at least making out and cuddling if not having hard core gay sex."

"Like hell I'd do that to you," Sasuke scowled.

"Yeah, I know. Bleh." Naruto made a face.

"Not even a rapist would go after you."

Naruto shot him a glare. "What's that supposed to mean?" Without waiting for a reply he went on, "Well at least I don't have Orochimaru after my butt."

"You're probably so desperate you wish you did," said Sasuke, the corners of his lips tugging upwards.

Bright blue eyes widened. He turned his head, put his palm to his face, and gasped. "Ew. Do not."

"Hm."

The clock ticked and the rain kept pouring.

"Gay sex..." Naruto drawled, clicking the back button. "It's girls writing these, right? _Teenage_ girls. How would they know enough the write these things?"

"Who knows..." Sasuke mumbled. He leaned back into the couch and covered his eyes with his arm.

"I'm not even at all _close _to liking you that way." Naruto looked at him. "You tired?"

"My legs are." The Uchiha glared at the blond. "You've been sitting on me for the past couple of hours. They've fallen asleep and gone numb. Fatass." He earned a knock on the head.

"It's all muscle! And I already told you, I'm not getting off till you try it."

"I've already told you, I don't want to eat the damn ramen," Sasuke scowled.

Naruto pouted. "I'm just being a great friend and sharing something wonderful with you! It's a new flavor, and it's really good, and if you don't eat it within this hour I will strap you to my bed, straddle you, and force feed you. And you WILL LIKE IT."

"The ramen, or you straddling me?" Sasuke lifted his arm and peered at the blond with one eye. "And why the bed?"

"Er...The ramen. And 'cuz my room is probably the scariest room here." Sakura could try and try to get Naruto to clean his room, but she still had yet to succeed.

"I could believe that." His arm went back over his face again. "I don't care what the hell you do to me. You could try to beat the shit out of me and I still wouldn't eat it or like it."

"Oh, I wouldn't try, I WOULD beat the shit out of you."

"But then I wouldn't be able to eat, if you did, which you couldn't of course."

The laptop shut with a click. Naruto snarled. "Oh, really? You wanna take it outside, huh?"

"It's raining out, moron."

"..." He grabbed Sasuke by the collar, got off of him, and threw him on the floor before sitting on him again. He pulled him up by the collar again to glare down at the boy while his other hand was on the ground to support him. "You _know _I could totally kick your ass."

"I know you totally couldn't," Sasuke replied cooly.

"Teme!"

Just then lightning flashed brightly through the window, and shortly after a monstrously loud clap of thunder shook the house.

"Gah!" Naruto cried. His hand on the floor had slipped and he fell over Sasuke.

"Nngh!" Sasuke grunted.

"Ow," they both groaned.

"That was really loud..." said Naruto.

"Your shoulder hit my face..." the raven haired boy mumbled.

"Aw, pretty boy is upset his perfect little face got injured."

"Shut the fuck up and get off of me."

"Mn, actually I'm pretty comfortable this way..." the blond said lazily with a smirk.

"Get off or else," Sasuke snarled.

"Ooh, threatening," said Naruto, still laying on top of him.

Sasuke sighed, and so the two boys stayed in that position.

"You know this is starting to seem like one of those SasuNaru fanfics..."

"Hn."

"Well, it'd be more of a NaruSasu since I'm on top," Naruto grinned. Sasuke couldn't see his face, but he could hear the grin in the blond's voice.

"We all know if you and I were actuallly in a relationship you'd be on the bottom," he said.

"Yeah sure, but I'm not the one with 'uke' in my name."

"I'm not the one who acts 'uke.'"

"I don't act uke! Besides a lot of the fics I've read have you on the bottom."

"Stupid, you just didn't choose to read the ones where I top, which is the majority I will add."

"Well so what?!"

"Well anyway the dominant one is usually the older one or the more mature one, and I'm both."

"Oh, you're only older by a few months."

"Three."

"Teme..."

"How would you know that anyway?"

"What?"

"Uke-seme stuff." Naruto's mouth stretched wide and his eyes curved. "Do you watch yaoi?"

"No."

"Liar!"

"Why do you read gay fan porn?"

"Why do you watch gay cartoon porn?"

"I never said I did."

"You never said you didn't."

"Yes I did."

"So you do watch yaoi."

"No, I meant yes I did say I didn't."

"...Kiss me."

"No. Usuratonkachi."

"Okay. Just testing you."

"What the fuck."

"Maybe if you'd kiss me I might be in the mood..."

"What?"

"Hm?" Naruto propped himself up so he could look Sasuke in the eye. They were very close. They could feel each other's warm breath. " You know what, I'll do it then."

Obsidian eyes blinked and widened. "W-what?"

"I'll kiss you..."

Slowly, the distance between them shortened. Sasuke's breath hitched when he felt Naruto's lips on his, just barely..

"Baka..." He let his fingers entangle themselves in Naruto's golden locks and gently pulled him down to deepen the feather light kiss. He slipped in his tongue, and Naruto moaned quietly. Sasuke flipped him over without breaking contact , so that the blond was flat on the floor instead. They broke away to take a breath, and Naruto looked him in the eye.

"Nuh uh," he whispered, struggling, trying to get Sasuke off of him.

Sasuke held rather firm with a smirk, but was taken by surprise when he suddenly found his back to the floor with Naruto sitting on him once again. Sasuke scowled.

"I always top," said Naruto with a grin. "Anyway, let's get back to what we were doing, shall we?"

"Hn," Sasuke grunted, still scowling.

Naruto leaned in, and Sasuke felt the scowl on his face drop slowly, when suddenly--

_CRACK!_

"OW, DAMMIT! WHAT THE HELL?!"

"No!" cried Naruto, his fist still suspended in the air. "We can't do this!"

"What the hell are you talking about?!" Sasuke yelled, covering his bruised jaw with his hand. His head was throbbing from the impact. "Why did you hit me?"

"Sasuke, we-we're giving in to the fangirls by doing this!"

"What? I wasn't pressured to kiss you or anything. Were you pressured to kiss me?" inquired the Uchiha.

"...Yeah..." Naruto mumbled, looking off to the side with a sheepish expression. "So, see, well, they're EVIL. I can't do anything they tell me to, so I have to pretend I hate you, but I mean...I couldn't help it!" he exploded, turning back to Sasuke, who just blinked.

"...Um..."

"It's like this afternoon's turned out like some NaruSasu fanfic or something! I mean I was just sitting on you like that then and then you were under me and then we were arguing and then suddenly I was like 'kiss me' and you said 'no' but I didn't care then but then I was like 'then I'll kiss you' and then so I was going to but right before I really did I kind of just stopped barely before we were barely touching because I was wondering what would the fangirls do but then you went and called me stupid and pulled me down and then we kissed and oh YOU USED TONGUE!! GAAH!!" Naruto exclaimed, covering his mouth.

Sasuke punched the blond in the face and sat up. "If that were dialogue in some story there would be no commas in that run-on sentence. You talk too much."

"Ow ow ow. GAH! TONGUE!! NOOO!!" Naruto sobbed. "I mean, it was great, but--NO WHAT AM I SAYING?! IT WAS NOT GREAT! IT WILL GET THE YAOI FANGIRLS ALL HAPPY AND SQUEALING AND BLAAH AND THEN THEY'LL BE AFTER US EVEN MORE AND...aahhh..." _Fwump._

"What an afternoon..." Sasuke sighed and removed the syringe needle sticking out of the blond's thigh. He tossed it into the waste bin, dragged Naruto to the bedroom, and threw him on the bed before sitting down beside him. Suddenly a smirk crept upon his face. He turned to peer down at the sleeping Naruto with an evil glint in his eyes.

Buahaha, isn't that a funny mental image? Sasuke with the comical anime evil glint in his eyes. xD

STAY TUNED FOR THE **NEXT AND LAST CHAPTER**! ...er, well, click on **story alerts**.

If you enjoyed it so far I'd love to read any **comments **or questions. -cutely blinks-

Oh and sorry for any mechanical errors, I just try and do that as I go. I don't go back and fix all the commas or apostrophes or capitalization...I should. But I don't.

I think the post man is yelling.. THat's what they do here, I guess. THey stop in front of the apartments, and they just yell people's names up at the um, yeahs. it's weird... yeah, there are mail boxes here too, so I dont get it either..


	2. The clouds have cleared away

Chapter two!

He groaned quietly when he woke up, but he didn't try to get up. He opened his eyes, but everything was blurry. He blinked a few times to try and clear his vision, but it didn't work. He meant to try and rub away the sleepiness, but he couldn't bring his hand up. He could feel a light weight over his stomach that held down his arms. He wasn't sure what it was but he didn't bother trying to regain use of his arms and spent a little time blinking away until he could see better. He was in his room, he noticed, except for it was tinged orange-ish red. The window was open and showed a magnificent, fiery sunset. The storm clouds from before had cleared away. There was a warmth at his right side, but then he felt a breeze on his skin from the left where the window was and realized he was half naked. Except for then, when he concentrated under the sheet that covered him partly, he realized he only wore his boxers. His eyes widened and he looked to his right and was met by obsidian eyes gazing back at him.

"Good evening, sleeping beauty," he purred. "You're finally awake."

"S-s-sasuke? W-what are you doing here? ...And why aren't you wearing a shirt?"

"I had fun earlier this afternoon, Naruto," he said. "Maybe we should do it again sometime..."

"H-how come I'm naked?" Naruto inquired in a nervous, high pitched voice. "W-what did we do? Did we play strip poker? I always lose, I'm really bad at poker...Please tell me all we did was play strip poker."

Sasuke only chuckled and stroked the blond's cheek. "You did great..."

Naruto gulped. He felt Sasuke's hand under the sheet take his own into a firm grip. His hand followed curves, feeling soft, warm smoothness.

"Erm, you have well developed abs," said Naruto.

"Thank you. You do, too."

"...Eek!" The blond screeched suddenly and quickly pulled back his hand. His fingertips touched silky fabric, a waistband?

"Hm?"

"S-s-sasuke...t-tell me why you aren't wearing p-pants either?"

Sasuke smirked. "I'll tell you _what we did_ when we weren't wearing pants."

Bright blue eyes widened to the size of a frying pan. He gasped. "_OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! _THE YAOI FANGIRLS!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" The blond leaped out of bed and disappeared faster than a hamster on crack.

Sasuke stared after him and let himself chuckle.

"Ne, Sasuke, that was a cruel prank, don't you think? You know how paranoid he is of yaoi fangirls."

"He'll be fine, Kakashi-sensei. Give me the camcorder now."

The silver haired jounin wagged his finger. "Ah, there will be a price for my excellent camera work though."

His student scowled. "All you did was push the record button. It was on a tripod."

"In a tree. So I had to hold it too, or it would fall off. Anyway, all I want are ten to twenty copies of the tape."

"...You're going to sell them, aren't you?"

"Well, I'll give some away as gifts, too."

The end!!

Wait, is it "leaped" or "leapt?" ...is leapt a word? ...xx this is just what happens when i watch too much anime and don't read enough books.

Hm, I couldn't find the tapes on ebay though. :(

Y'know originally I had Sasuke not wear underwear either, but I decided that would be too cruel to Naruto. Also after I thought about it for a while, I didn't think Sasuke woudl go that far for a prank. well...as a reader, and me as a writer, we could pretend he didn't have underwear on anyway, and that Naruto didnt' pull his hand back. xD

!super short!

Naruto: **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**! _-smacks into the tree- _

Kakashi: _-wobbles a little-_ I think something ran into the tree down there...

Sasuke: _-sweatdrop-_ ...this is stupid...


End file.
